He loves me, he loves me not (Shadowhunters)
by thenewbrokenscene
Summary: What happens behind the scenes of the Shadowhunters TV show? Read and find out. Harry x Matthew


WHAT HAPPENS BEHIND THE SCENES?

Chapter 1

 **Third person pov**

"Hey Kat! Where's Matt? We have scene to shoot together and he's not here yet." Harry said in an annoyed tone, tapping his foot on the ground impatiently.

"Uhh... I think he was with Dom, in the institute set. Or in Dom's room." Kat replied, getting irritated by Harry's foot-tapping.

"Yeah, of course he is. He's always with Dom. He never wants to be around me. He's been avoiding me lately and I think- I think I know why." Harry said, his eyes suddenly downcast.

"What happened Harry? Did you guys fight or something?" Kat said, her eyes showing genuine concern for the older man.

"No, I think it's because... I came out to you guys." Harry whispered

"But, he was happy for you, that night. He was the first one to hug you and congratulate yo-"

"Yeah, but what about after that. Haven't you noticed, he's been avoiding me like I have a, disease or something!" Harry said, raising his voice

"Okay calm down. Maybe you just need to talk to him. Tell him that you don't like him avoiding you. He might understand." Kat said, trying to calm Harry down.

"He won't. He'll never understand. Because Kat, I'm not just gay, I also happen to like Matt. And if this is his reaction to me being gay, I can't imagine what he'll do if he found that out." Harry said, his voice raising to a very high pitch.

Harry threw down the script from his hands and stormed out of the room, his eyes glistening with anger. Harry felt lost; Matt was one of his best friends. He hated the fact that he was losing him. He spoiled it all. He just had to go and fall in love with Matt. He just had to like guys. And in the process make Matt hate him. Hell, maybe even disgusted with him. But why didn't Matt just tell him that? Maybe he hated even talking to him. He was just a loser. A freaky, homosexual loser.

 **Matt** **'** **s pov**

Hands on my head, I was sitting in my dressing room thinking about him. Dom entered, smirking, but soon his smirk left after seeing me.

I snorted quietly. I probably looked like he had lost someone close. Wow! I'm in ruins.

"Pranked someone again?" I asked. "Who was the victim this time?"

"Alberto." He said and continued to rant about the prank.

Dom was always good at everything. Be it flirting or pranking or acting. _No wonder he got selected as Jace._

"Got some problem, mate?" Dom asked, looking at him, concerned.

"Nothing." I muttered.

"What is it?" Dom asked again, obviously knowing something was off.

"I seriously don't know what's wrong with me. I can't think anything straight. Uggghh!"

"Oh mate, you are in love! Who is that lucky person?" Dom said his eyes lighting up.

My eyes widened for a second but I soon regained my composure.

 _No. This can't be true. I can't fall in love. What will everyone think after I reveal my sexuality? Will they still be my friends after they figure out I am gay? What will Harry think of me? Wait... why am I thinking about him? Did I fall in love with Harry? Oh no! I think I am going mad._

"Are you okay, Matthew?" Dom asked breaking me out of my train of thoughts.

"Yes" I answered slowly.

Dom shrugged his shoulders, changed the topic, knowing that Matt didn't want to talk about it.

"What's your next scene?" Gesturing the script in his hand, Dom asked.

I read the script rapidly, that's when I realise...

"It's with... Harry." I gulped as I said.

 _Oh no! Not him again!_ And my train of thoughts continued its journey with most of his stations named Harry.

"Yeah... I've been meaning to ask you about him. Have you been ignoring him? I don't know but, ever since he came out you haven't been talking to him much. Are you... okay with him being gay?" Dom questioned

"Ummm... I-I-"

"Oh yeah... I'm sure you'll be alright with it, since you're also gay, right?" Dom questioned teasingly

"W-what? I'm not gay. I mean I don't like boys. I-I'm straight." I stuttered suddenly freaking out.

 _Shit, shit, shit...He can't know I'm gay. He must be joking. What if Harry finds out? No, I should really stop thinking about Harry._

"Then explain why you spend half the time of your shoot staring and stuttering at Harry. I get that you play Alec, but you're like that even when you're not acting mate." Dom reasoned with me

"I... uh... I don't. I can't. Fine okay, I'm gay and I'm madly in love with Harry. Happy now? Now will you please leave, as I'm sure you won't want to be around me anymore." I practically screamed. Poor Dom, I really shouldn't be venting out my anger at him.

"Woah mate! I didn't mean to upset you. I was just asking. And why would I hate you? I pretty much knew that you were gay from the start, and I never hated you. And about Harry. If you like him, then why are you ignoring him instead of actually telling him?" Dom asked, trying to calm me down.

But, I didn't calm down.

"Oh sure. I tell him, and then he starts hating me? He's already going to hate me for being gay, but if he hears that I like him, it's going to be worse."

"Matt, if you haven't noticed, Harry's gay too. Why would he hate you for being gay if he's gay too."

He does have a point. Harry won't have a problem that I'm gay. But he will have a problem with me liking him. Harry's like the awesomest and most perfect person in the world and I'm just an idiotic...freak.

"Uhhh...earth to Matt." Dom was waving his hand in front of my face, trying to get my attention. "You were thinking of him weren't you? Anyway, you should get going. You have a scene to shoot with your dream boy."


End file.
